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Hitting back a woman - a taboo, an evil

questdriven said:
Self defense. That said, if someone calls the police, keep in mind it's the guy who's going to go to jail, because the law is biased in favor of women in those kind of situations. It is fair? No.
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Come on Questdriven!
I'm still laughing.

It's not fair...?
How big are you?
6 feet, 200 pounds?

No?
Then how is it not fair?
Are you one of those feminists Papa Zoom is talking about??
 
Sparrowhawke said:
Let's take it up a notch, shall we?

There was once a man who argued with his wife. She and he argued. They were husband and wife. The had exchanged sacred vows with each other before God. But they argued.

Once, during an argument, she took her lit cigarette and burned him with it. Burned his bare arm, right under the armpit. He was quite surprised and let out a yelp while pushing her backwards and away from him. She went backward and when her legs met the sofa, she was abruptly seated. She wasn't used to being pushed and she too was very surprised by the violent turn of things.

Now comes the question. Was the man guilty of 4th Degree Assault? This degree of assault is also called, "Unwanted touching," and describes the least amount of force found in a typical assault charge.

Answer: Yes. He is guilty. He committed assault. She did not want him to touch her like that. Now, to be fair, if she pressed charges he could have said he was defending himself (because he was) but that's a defense to a legal charge. In other words, the assault may have been justified in the eyes of the law. But you never know. Best to not take any chances when it comes to a jury trial.

But to continue the story we will return to the man. No charges were brought. The small burn mark on his right arm, just under the armpit was permanent and would remain 'his' for the remainder of his days. But that was not the only mark that was made on him. You see, this man had a tender conscious before the Lord. And he wanted to get to the bottom of the question.

So what did he do? He called a "Domestic Violence Hotline."

"I want to turn myself in," he explained to the lady on the other end of the phone.

"Oh?" she replied.

"I recently was hurt and I shoved my wife backward and she fell onto the couch," he explained, leaving out certain key details.

"Was your wife injured," the violence counselor asked.

"No. She was not."

"Okay, I think I understand you to say that you have recently pushed your wife and she fell backwards into the couch but she was not injured, is this correct?" she asked.

"Yes. That is correct," the repentant man replied. You see, he had been convicted by a higher court, by the Holy Spirit, who is and was and shall always be utterly apart from all sin.

"Then let me ask you something, if you don't mind, please?" She pressed in.

He could tell something was up, that she was about to make a point, but that was what he was there for. He needed help in order to better understand. "Go ahead," he said.

"What do you think would have happened if it was not your wife and if you had done the exact same thing to a neighbor lady?"

Case closed. All the understanding that the man needed had been delivered succinctly, rather forcefully, and yet in a very gentle manner. It was almost as if the answer had been tailored fitted to him; the answer fit so very well.

"She would have called the police and may have sued me for all that I'm worth."

"I believe you are correct," was the reply from the other end of the phone.

She concluded the phone call thanking him for calling and saying that she'd like to give him a chance to think about what they had just talked about.

[CLICK]
​
By the way, the legal term 'Assault' describes the mental state of the victim more than actual physical harm done. Yes, it may also entail physical harm, but more-so the fear that is being put into the victim. A person could point a gun at somebody and if the target did not know it? There would be no assault. But if they saw it? It is the fear that is put into the other person that determines 'Assault with a deadly weapon,' even if there was no shot fired. An assault is carried out by a threat of bodily harm coupled with an apparent, present ability to cause the harm. It is not okay to intimidate others.

Under this definition, he was clearly guilty of at least 4th degree assault. Under the definitions of sin in the Bible, he was not only guilty of that small point, he was guilty of the whole law. Love covers a thing and God is Love. Needless to say, he did repent, has turned away from all violence and will always and forever know what his hands have done.
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What did you just say????
Oh yeah.
No matter what a woman does to you, you keep your hands to yourself.

Here's a little song you might enjoy...

 
Atonement said:
How we react under these circumstances will give us a understanding of who we are when our inner-beast (if you will) has been roused. Some may "hit" back cause they feel they are pushed into a corner and let's face it even the smallest of animals will fight-back if backed into a corner.
But then there are others who can see the escalation rising and walk away before things get out of hand. As a boxer of 17 years I can tell you. Learning to tame our "inner-beast" is essential. Learning to keep your cool and control is vital especially in relationships. Acknowledge the deeper problems before it escalates.
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I see you got a gal there...
Too bad.
 
Edward said:
Well...Not really, Brother. I don't think anyone has posted that they hit em for hitting them once. I've been slapped buy a few different women in my time but the only one I ever hit back was that GF, but it wasn't the first time she slapped me. There does seem to be some sort of expected tolerance for a woman who is very upset and slaps (whoever) one time. A man will take it and not be offended. But women who go further than that are trying to take advantage of the situation. My then GF prolly hit me 6 or 8 times over the course of a few days before I raised my hand to her. What's a guy to do when a woman wont stop? She made her point the first time. Additional slaps only served to make a different point.

So....how many times should a man let a woman hit them before they react? I can understand if the woman hits him, a good thing might be to take a walk so she can calm down. If he does so, then returns later...and she hits him again...then he should leave again? How many times before its reasonable to confront her lack of control?

There's an old saying, spare the rod spoil the child. If someone learns that there is no consequences for their actions, then they'll take advantage of it. It seems to be human nature. That's also the main reason that law was invented. That old GF would have continued to be physical with me if I hadn't explained to her that if it continues, she will have consequences. One time she tried to hit me in the head with a glass pop bottle! I ducked and felt it part my hair as she narrowly missed me. I laughed that one off too. I seen the pattern in her behavior but before I could shake her off permanently, she got me the one time too many and I did react. I eventually left her sitting wondering where I went to. I lived happily ever after.

There's another saying, a little less official than the first...if a woman is big enough to stand up and take a poke at a man, then she's big enough to take it like a man.

:shrug
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Oh.
You're sooooo serious!
 
Edward said:
Well...Not really, Brother. I don't think anyone has posted that they hit em for hitting them once. I've been slapped buy a few different women in my time but the only one I ever hit back was that GF, but it wasn't the first time she slapped me. There does seem to be some sort of expected tolerance for a woman who is very upset and slaps (whoever) one time. A man will take it and not be offended. But women who go further than that are trying to take advantage of the situation. My then GF prolly hit me 6 or 8 times over the course of a few days before I raised my hand to her. What's a guy to do when a woman wont stop? She made her point the first time. Additional slaps only served to make a different point.

So....how many times should a man let a woman hit them before they react? I can understand if the woman hits him, a good thing might be to take a walk so she can calm down. If he does so, then returns later...and she hits him again...then he should leave again? How many times before its reasonable to confront her lack of control?

There's an old saying, spare the rod spoil the child. If someone learns that there is no consequences for their actions, then they'll take advantage of it. It seems to be human nature. That's also the main reason that law was invented. That old GF would have continued to be physical with me if I hadn't explained to her that if it continues, she will have consequences. One time she tried to hit me in the head with a glass pop bottle! I ducked and felt it part my hair as she narrowly missed me. I laughed that one off too. I seen the pattern in her behavior but before I could shake her off permanently, she got me the one time too many and I did react. I eventually left her sitting wondering where I went to. I lived happily ever after.

There's another saying, a little less official than the first...if a woman is big enough to stand up and take a poke at a man, then she's big enough to take it like a man.

:shrug
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If a woman slaps you, you don't hit her, you leave her - you shouldn't be in a relationship with someone who hits you
(same goes the other way around of course)
 
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