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[__ Prayer __] i gotta stay the course

hey, nordica...

...I'm on misdemeanor probation. Usually, this sort of probation is over after 1 year or so...the ex-shrink who filed the charges asked for the maximum, so I was given a full 5 years probation, which leaves me with about 3 1/2 years before I can even think about moving. That's part of what makes this situation so rough.
 
Hi CE

I believe how you feel about yourself and what you stand for as a person is really so important. You are what you say you are and the world judges you on the image you portray. To be confident, have integrity, self assured yet humble are qualities we should always strive for.
I noticed that you always bring up the person you were or how the world perceives you. You not that person anymore and you have come such a long way.
I know it can be so hard to let go and the reminders constantly pop up, it even feels at times as if you moving around in circles. But just be strong and try your best to let it go. People who actually matter will respect you for you are, if they not its actually good that you don't associate with them and it says so much about their character.
Sometimes we go through things and things seem so IMPOSSIBLE and as if the situation cannot get any better. But God is bigger than our problems and he can transform any situation around, we just need to constantly pray. I'm also going through a bit of a issue at the moment and praying all the time and wondering when things will be over and done with. But I see myself finding God, the key is just to keep a positive attitude and just focus on your end goal of the person you want to be and striving to be.
 
Hi CE

I believe how you feel about yourself and what you stand for as a person is really so important. You are what you say you are and the world judges you on the image you portray. To be confident, have integrity, self assured yet humble are qualities we should always strive for.
I noticed that you always bring up the person you were or how the world perceives you. You not that person anymore and you have come such a long way.
I know it can be so hard to let go and the reminders constantly pop up, it even feels at times as if you moving around in circles. But just be strong and try your best to let it go. People who actually matter will respect you for you are, if they not its actually good that you don't associate with them and it says so much about their character.
Sometimes we go through things and things seem so IMPOSSIBLE and as if the situation cannot get any better. But God is bigger than our problems and he can transform any situation around, we just need to constantly pray. I'm also going through a bit of a issue at the moment and praying all the time and wondering when things will be over and done with. But I see myself finding God, the key is just to keep a positive attitude and just focus on your end goal of the person you want to be and striving to be.
 
Christ_empowered said:
hey, nordica...

...I'm on misdemeanor probation. Usually, this sort of probation is over after 1 year or so...the ex-shrink who filed the charges asked for the maximum, so I was given a full 5 years probation, which leaves me with about 3 1/2 years before I can even think about moving. That's part of what makes this situation so rough.
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Oh, that's tough. But at least you've got your parents, and God uses difficult circumstances to prune us and refine our faith, hold on and keep growing in the Lord.
 
Rob Cuse said:
Keep your eyes on the prize, as they say.
Click to expand...

Whenever I get frustrated, I think to myself "Well, what else are you going to do, how else you going to deal with life? Stop being Christian?" Then I just kinda laugh at the thought and remind myself, this is a no brainer, I'm on the very best path I could possibly be on so just move on, never let go (don't think I could if I wanted to) and do as Rob said, keep your eye on the prize.
 
yeah, I'm thinking a lot of it is dying down, anyway. I have too much time on my hands to reflect, plus my neighbors don't mind expressing their opinions really, really too loudly, so..yeah. I'd like to get a job, but I have a terrible reputation, no recent work experience, and a fresh misdemeanor (and not a minor one). I'm beginning to see that The Lord has blessed me in a big, big way with disability, at least for this season of my life...plus, I get to do online college, which is awesome.

The Lord put this on my heart while I was praying...Jesus has been workin on my behalf even before I got saved. How else would I even have survived? I'm out of total darkness now, and...yeah...a lot of this is just people finally being open about their contempt for me, which is OK, I guess.

There's plenty of people like me in prisons, jail, state mental hospitals (in more "progressive" areas), homeless, skid row, dead at a young age....its not amazing that my community "has a problem" with me...Christ's work in my life is what's truly unexpected and miraculous.
 
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

This verse came to mind. Also,

Revelation 21:3-5
I heard a loud shout from the throne, saying, “Look, God’s home is now among his people! He will live with them, and they will be his people. God himself will be with them. 4 He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.”

5 And the one sitting on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new!” And then he said to me, “Write this down, for what I tell you is trustworthy and true.”

I hope these verses encourage you.
 
I would also maybe think it's time to move to another town after your probation. But then again I also think when we are in rough situations we ask God to take us out of it, however he has put us in these situations to change us. Maybe you would never have found God if you had not gone through all your ordeals? Look at how much you have achieved lately in comparison to your past? As you said God's work is truly unexpected and miraculous. Let's just pray that our fears don't overpower our faith. When you have a bad day read this thread.
 
jack K said:
I would also maybe think it's time to move to another town after your probation. But then again I also think when we are in rough situations we ask God to take us out of it, however he has put us in these situations to change us. Maybe you would never have found God if you had not gone through all your ordeals? Look at how much you have achieved lately in comparison to your past? As you said God's work is truly unexpected and miraculous. Let's just pray that our fears don't overpower our faith. When you have a bad day read this thread.
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I have to agree with Jack. I've been in the same situation before (similar) and thought of moving, but it could be that the Lord has you right where He wants you? That these things are a particular trial of yours? Be sure of that before you go moving.

Besides, isn't your situation bad enough that it...keeps you clinging to the Lord? This is entirely possible and you wouldn't want to pull a Jonah on God if you were to be there and going through these things for your spiritual growth.

:wink
 
I dunno. I just...I think I'm going to have to move. The shrinks "made an example" out of me. I'm offically in recovery from everything, but these former shrinks keep telling people "he recently developed schizophrenia." Back in the day, it was "narcissism," and they got a whole community to put me through Hell. I was supposed to be dead by 23, so...yeah. I'm not Mr.Popular 'round here. But I don't think I'm even ready to move. I can't support myself, I don't know how to do basic car stuff, I'm physically out of shape (did I mention the "dead by 23" thing? Yeah...sickly, until recently), and I don't have a job or anything, so if I move, I'd just be living off my parents+disability, and chillin in some random neighborhood.

People don't like unemployed, mentally ill people. In the neighborhoods I've been in, everything's cool for a little bit, and then they're all "why doesn't he work?!?!," and there's resentment, because they have to work, what's this "crazy" guy doing not working, blah blah blah. So, I'm wondering if maybe I should just stay with my people for the duration of probation, get a degree, learn how to do stuff, and then move out when I can get a job based on my degree(s).
 
You're correct, Christ_empowered, that you should remain right where you are for the time being. You are studying and working towards your degree, which could become very trying if you were on your own. You also wouldn't have the safety net of having your parents (i.e., witnesses/alibis) for support should someone make some outrageously false claim against you.

In due time, you will be ready to be on your own. Employed, supporting yourself, meeting other people.

Plus, your faith and your walk will both be much stronger than it is at this time. We grow stronger each day when we're focused on studying Scripture and focusing on our Lord!
 
Thanks, AIrDancer. Work-in-progress....true of all Born Again Christians, especially me, lol. And you're right about having people behind me while I'm on probation. My PO is already tightening down on me for some reason (I have to see her every 2 months in person and there may be drug tests. She's coming to the house sometimes next week!), and I live with quite respectable people. If I were out on my own in some random apartment or something, there's no telling what the PO would be putting me through. Ugh (shudder).

I'm blessed all around. I read some CS Lewis (yeah, I know...always referencing him), and he said something that I now find interesting...how when you first get saved, all kinds of good things happen. Its intense, for a lot of people. Then its not so much miracles and sudden transformations....I guess then its faith- and character-building. Our Lord knows what He's doing...

I'm glad I'm in history, because now I realize how important Jesus is. This is kind of off topic, but a cool thing about Liberty is that the History classes talk about Christianity throughout the ages--missionaries, evangelists, that kind of thing. I just watched a video on Moody. How cool is that?

Anyway, without Christ...life is fairly meaningless, and people are animal-like. I mean...human nature is rough, rough, rough. But with Christ...whole societies change, for the better. Of course, Christianity itself is subversive, in its true form. This is why some countries killed their missionaries.

And...I'm done. :)
 
Very true...we're all works-in-progress. What a wonderful way to celebrate life!

Once a Christian has left the 'baby' stage, we experience times of challenges, which are to strengthen and hone us into more courageous and knowledgeable Christians. There will still be times of miracles within our lives, as well as times when life seems to be smooth sailing. Both the challenging times and the smooth times are designed to test our mettle ...and these are every bit as much blessings as those moments of blessings!
 
Christ_empowered said:
But they have a point. I think a lot of my schizo-bipolar-whatever is rooted in a mix of stress and un-forgiveness. The problem is that I pray for my enemies, I pray for God to "bless them above and beyond what they actually need," and...still holding onto some anger, lol. I can't do anything in the flesh except try to psychobabble my way out, and that never works. Ugh.
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You know CE, I found that when I stopped thinking of someone as my enemy it was very helpful to stay in forgiveness.
I had to remember that other people are just people who have their own fears, backgrounds, psychological problems, etc. that effect how they perceive others, not just me. It actually it's personal, they are not MY enemy. Often they are their own worst enemy. Compassion for them the way they are is conducive to forgiveness.
 
you're right, deborah. In my better moments, I try to step into the other person's worldview and see things from their perspective. This is The Bible Belt ("1,000 miles wide, 1 inch deep"), so things are crazy conservative and hypocritical, too. Mentally ill homosexuals=not Mr.Popular, even before everything else is factored in. Its just a matter of realizing that I'm not Mr.Popular, and I'm not going to be Mr.Popular, you know?
 
Christ_empowered said:
you're right, deborah. In my better moments, I try to step into the other person's worldview and see things from their perspective. This is The Bible Belt ("1,000 miles wide, 1 inch deep"), so things are crazy conservative and hypocritical, too. Mentally ill homosexuals=not Mr.Popular, even before everything else is factored in. Its just a matter of realizing that I'm not Mr.Popular, and I'm not going to be Mr.Popular, you know?
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Well, I am not popular in the place I am at the moment because it turned out people seem to envy me. The older I get, the less it starts to bother me. Of course, it hurts, but in the long run our main focus should be if the Lord is pleased with us or not rather than people.
 
Christ_empowered said:
you're right, deborah. In my better moments, I try to step into the other person's worldview and see things from their perspective. This is The Bible Belt ("1,000 miles wide, 1 inch deep"), so things are crazy conservative and hypocritical, too. Mentally ill homosexuals=not Mr.Popular, even before everything else is factored in. Its just a matter of realizing that I'm not Mr.Popular, and I'm not going to be Mr.Popular, you know?
Click to expand...
The problem is that we can't always seen things from the individuals view because we don't know their personal life. We don't know how they were raised, what may have happened to them and the people in their lives that has set the tone for their individual character and behaviors.
For instance when someone says that a person is conservative the picture I get of conservative doesn't first envision their politics or religion, but a person who has good character. They are classy people. Classy doesn't mean money, classy means good manners, etiquette that doesn't allow them to do things like your neighbors do. They don't take pleasure in gossiping and making snide remarks about others. If they have a problem with someone they speak to them face to face. So I would say that your neighbors are not your personal enemy. What they do to you they would do to anyone, that cannot benefit them in some way, because that is their character. Hypocrites, maybe, but definitely not people you or I would want as friends. But still we can be compassionate towards them because we don't know why they are the way they are.
 
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