As it is written, “Jacob I have loved, but Esau I have hated.”
Romans 9:13
Do you hate your father and mother?
Do you hate your brother?
“If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple. Luke 14:26
The point being “hate” means prefer one over another in the course of choosing for His purpose, not choosing for salvation.
The purpose being the bloodline lineage of the Messiah.
The
context of Romans 9 is about election
according to purpose not election for salvation.
You have completely taken the verse out of it’s context to try and make it fit your narrative.
For I could wish that I myself were accursed from Christ for my brethren, my countrymen according to the flesh, who are Israelites, to whom pertain the adoption, the glory, the covenants, the giving of the law, the service of God, and the promises; of whom are the fathers and from whom, according to the flesh, Christ came, who is over all, the eternally blessed God. Amen. Romans 9:3-5
- of whom are the fathers and from whom, according to the flesh, Christ came
He skillfully shows that specific ones were chosen to be the bloodline through which Christ came.
God chose Jacob over Esau.
Just as we are to choose following Christ over our family, even if our father or mother were to try and persuade us not to, which many Jewish did in the first century.
This is what the word “hate” means in these verses.
God is love.
God is not hate.
For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.
John 3:16
God loves even His enemies, and He instructs us to do the same.
“
You have heard that it was said, You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect. Matthew 5:43-48
JLB