My mother is a spiteful woman

[Michellay]

If I can just mention my own mother. She had 7 kids and spent much of her life slaving to raise us. But she had a loyal, loving husband, my father. So she had no bitterness I'm aware of. I'm just saying that a disloyal husband may contribute to some of your mothers' bad behaviours.

Very true, but I had a whole life of struggles and I wouldn’t even dream of behaving that way. I like to discuss things and help people with any resources I have.

She tells me that I only help her so I can control her. Then everything I was thinking of repairing goes out the window like fixing and cleaning up the house so I can have family over, I would have family over now, but she doesn’t want it because she says the house is a mess. Go figure huh.Total catch 22. She makes it impossible to make things better.

 

[Michellay]

If I can just mention my own mother. She had 7 kids and spent much of her life slaving to raise us. But she had a loyal, loving husband, my father. So she had no bitterness I'm aware of. I'm just saying that a disloyal husband may contribute to some of your mothers' bad behaviours.

You’re very blessed to have had loving parents.

 

[Corn Pop]

You have to care the best you can.

 

[humble soul]

Very true, but I had a whole life of struggles and I wouldn’t even dream of behaving that way. I like to discuss things and help people with any resources I have.

She tells me that I only help her so I can control her. Then everything I was thinking of repairing goes out the window like fixing and cleaning up the house so I can have family over, I would have family over now, but she doesn’t want it because she says the house is a mess. Go figure huh.Total catch 22. She makes it impossible to make things better.

She might be going senile too. My wife complains about her mother talking to her like she was still a child.
Ok , enormous amounts of patience required on your part. Huuuuuuge! God is testing you imo.
Can you grow into the person God wants you to become?
I almost got angry with my boss yesterday. But bit my lip. I need to behave like this more often even I don't feel like it.
But I'm not really qualified to advise because I have never had to care for an aged parent.

 

[humble soul]

You’re very blessed to have had loving parents.

I am. But I'm spoilt. I expect everyone to be as nice as my parents. So I'm bound to be disappointed.

 

[JLB]

Thank you. I really appreciate that.
She’s very hateful though.

Been there. Done that!


Be blessed. Be at peace.

May God give you strength and grace.



JLB

 

[Michellay]

She might be going senile too. My wife complains about her mother talking to her like she was still a child.
Ok , enormous amounts of patience required on your part. Huuuuuuge! God is testing you imo.
Can you grow into the person God wants you to become?
I almost got angry with my boss yesterday. But bit my lip. I need to behave like this more often even I don't feel like it.
But I'm not really qualified to advise because I have never had to care for an aged parent.

She is going senile but she was always mean.

 

[Truthfrees]

I’ve been trying to fix the house up so I can bring family around my mother. She needs this so she doesn’t spend her last years in isolation. She should be ever so grateful to me (pats self on back) for all I’m doing. Even though I’m living rent free, I earn my share by all I do and then some (I should be getting paid let alone pay) because I pick up the slack. She does absolutely nothing. Free rent. Wow! Big deal. I’m supposed to be her daughter and I can’t afford to give her rent. Not my problem. She’s extremely selfish.

She let all her medications run out and instead of being ruthless and letting her die, I served God by convincing her to go to the ER to get prescriptions for her meds. Then I even went to the pharmacy to pick them up. Not one thank you left that old witch’s mouth. The next day I tried to make an appointment for her to get her bloodwork done. It’s been over a year. She wanted to be picky about which area she wanted to go. This is not Burger King, have it your way. Wherever we go, there needs to be parking so it’s more convenient for me. She started a big argument and called the police on me because in her feelings, I was being disrespectful to her. Like whatever lady.

So she basically gave me a hard time. Now I think I should just let her die next time she needs me and hopefully she won’t be spiteful so I can get all her money and the apartment so I can live my life peacefully. Seriously, I’m praying that she won’t be spiteful.

I’m really torn on what to do. Every time I do something to help her, she twists it and says I’m trying to control her and that it only benefits me.

sorry to hear what you are going through - praying -

 

[Tessa]

Michelina, dear Sister !
You need help. You can't go on indefinitely alone. I feel so much for you. Fibromalgia is bad enough to cope with when you haven't got all this stress added on.
Have you got sisters who could help? I'm praying The Lord will open a door for you, that your mother will agree to having some home care.
I'm worried about your emotional health too. We can only take so much abuse before it affects us.
I know you are a strong lady but please see a doctor if you feel the need. You must be exhausted. praying for you.

 

[Pipiripi]

I’ve been trying to fix the house up so I can bring family around my mother. She needs this so she doesn’t spend her last years in isolation. She should be ever so grateful to me (pats self on back) for all I’m doing. Even though I’m living rent free, I earn my share by all I do and then some (I should be getting paid let alone pay) because I pick up the slack. She does absolutely nothing. Free rent. Wow! Big deal. I’m supposed to be her daughter and I can’t afford to give her rent. Not my problem. She’s extremely selfish.

She let all her medications run out and instead of being ruthless and letting her die, I served God by convincing her to go to the ER to get prescriptions for her meds. Then I even went to the pharmacy to pick them up. Not one thank you left that old witch’s mouth. The next day I tried to make an appointment for her to get her bloodwork done. It’s been over a year. She wanted to be picky about which area she wanted to go. This is not Burger King, have it your way. Wherever we go, there needs to be parking so it’s more convenient for me. She started a big argument and called the police on me because in her feelings, I was being disrespectful to her. Like whatever lady.

So she basically gave me a hard time. Now I think I should just let her die next time she needs me and hopefully she won’t be spiteful so I can get all her money and the apartment so I can live my life peacefully. Seriously, I’m praying that she won’t be spiteful.

Michelina, God has sent you here for one purpose. God has seen everything that you have doing not only for her, but also for others. I want you to read Matthew 25:31-46. True Christians love. We all love you, the devil hate you because you have choose to talk and knowing the Christian life better. God is the only one that can give you true love. Our love is God's love. Satan hate you so much. Revelation 12:12. So feel free to ask any questions

 

[Pipiripi]

I appreciate the empathy. Sometimes I wonder if she will ever get saved. I know that the Word of God can pass through any form of dementia if the heart is willing, but anytime I’ve discussed God’s Word with her it’s either in one ear and out the other or she wants to argue.

What you must do now is don't talk to much with her, she's more afraid to loose you then you think. Let she speak and thank God for everything that she says. From today I will sent you to our Almighty God. This is your battle take what God is giving you. Ephesians 6:10-18. I love you so much!

 

[Edward]

It sounds like your mom has had a rough life. Perhaps harder than you have had. Do you love your mom despite everything? She is your mom, and a hard life fraught with betrayals and such can make someone turn mean. But deep down you either love her or you don't. Do you?

 

[Michellay]

sorry to hear what you are going through - praying -

Thank you ??

 

[Michellay]

What you must do now is don't talk to much with her, she's more afraid to loose you then you think. Let she speak and thank God for everything that she says. From today I will sent you to our Almighty God. This is your battle take what God is giving you. Ephesians 6:10-18. I love you so much!

Thank you for understanding what is happening to me. Yes, satan will attack us from every side when he sees we draw closer to God. She does need me because while there are moments she’s perfectly fine, there are those moments she’s a danger to herself.she goes back and forth from being super independent and then very needy. She doesn’t want to accept that she needs help and gets so mean and says hateful things.

 

[Pipiripi]

Thank you for understanding what is happening to me. Yes, satan will attack us from every side when he sees we draw closer to God. She does need me because while there are moments she’s perfectly fine, there are those moments she’s a danger to herself.she goes back and forth from being super independent and then very needy. She doesn’t want to accept that she needs help and gets so mean and says hateful things.

If you have read Ephesians 6:10-18, you know now that it isn't your mother that are saying and spit on you, but the demons in her. When you are with her just see here and see the demons in here. And the Holy Spirit that is in you will speak through you. Don't hate your mom anymore. Love her, it is the same what was happened to Jesus on the cross. Do you remember Jesus last Word on the cross. It is the same way with us. Carry your cross and follow Jesus. Sooner we are together forever. I love you!

 

[Pipiripi]

You are extremely judgmental and have a lot of nerve making assumptions about me.

You know how the demons work. When you have time look on YouTube. How demons steal our prayers. Let me know when you have seen it. God bless you.

 

[Couppy]

I have definitely been patient. Some have suggested that I move out. That would be tough because I have fibromyalgia and my income fluctuates due to that. Secondly, if I were to move, she’s really be on her own because I would not be able to be there as much. She fell once and couldn’t even get to the phone to call me at work. It took her hours because she couldn’t get off the floor. Finally when she reached me I had to rush home and call 911. If she falls in the middle of the night making a trip to the bathroom there will be no one there to help her. If I suggest a home attendant she’ll really go out of her mind.

Despite all the money and apartment you are after, and telling us you don't care if she dies, I believe you still care very much for her, otherwise you would not spend much time taking care of her. I know it is stressful taking care of someone who may some times show mental incapability and is also struggling to cope with what they are going through. It is very frustrating if they are not doing what we want them to do, assuming they are purposely trying to wind you up, especially when we are spending our time and effort on them. Deep down, your mother may appreciate what you are doing for her, but the atmosphere might have become too toxic between both of you to have a good loving conversation.

She feel safe with you, and that is why she does not want a stranger looking after her. I have a friend who was stressed out with attending to her mother's constant needs that she kept losing her job over and over again. She did not have a social life. It was very hard. You need someone to help you out so that you can have a break yourself because you are a carer in your own condition. Negotiate for a temporary home attendant to be there for her on one weekend. As a Christian, let God continue to strengthen you.

 

[jasonc]

perhaps ,she is sick of the games ,my,wife's mother ,in particular has never been one and my,wife feels like this.some people are cruel,mean and shouldn't have had kids and God saw you were birthed by those ,and you,have these mixed feelings ,sometimes the anger needs to be vented .

I,feel this way about the older step child whom shafted me and her own kids. yet ismt all there.i don't expect agreement but understanding of why we DO have broken families and How some are saved but have a long road and change that must be a path only those who have trodded down can advise .my battle isn't,just ptsd .my,wife and myself are very broken .my,wife can be verbally,abusive and her kids have had these issues with her.I,have had mediate this.her youngest has kept a difficult relationship there intact and its not a bed of roses nor hallmark mother and daughter type of stuff.

 

[Michellay]

If you have read Ephesians 6:10-18, you know now that it isn't your mother that are saying and spit on you, but the demons in her. When you are with her just see here and see the demons in here. And the Holy Spirit that is in you will speak through you. Don't hate your mom anymore. Love her, it is the same what was happened to Jesus on the cross. Do you remember Jesus last Word on the cross. It is the same way with us. Carry your cross and follow Jesus. Sooner we are together forever. I love you!

Thank you my brother. I definitely need strength from God and prayer to be strong, the way Aaron and Hur held up Moses’ arms.

 

[Michellay]

Despite all the money and apartment you are after, and telling us you don't care if she dies, I believe you still care very much for her, otherwise you would not spend much time taking care of her. I know it is stressful taking care of someone who may some times show mental incapability and is also struggling to cope with what they are going through. It is very frustrating if they are not doing what we want them to do, assuming they are purposely trying to wind you up, especially when we are spending our time and effort on them. Deep down, your mother may appreciate what you are doing for her, but the atmosphere might have become too toxic between both of you to have a good loving conversation.

She feel safe with you, and that is why she does not want a stranger looking after her. I have a friend who was stressed out with attending to her mother's constant needs that she kept losing her job over and over again. She did not have a social life. It was very hard. You need someone to help you out so that you can have a break yourself because you are a carer in your own condition. Negotiate for a temporary home attendant to be there for her on one weekend. As a Christian, let God continue to strengthen you.

Yeah because today she’s normal again. So, it would be so much easier if she wasn’t so rotten to me in the past, but yes I do care about her and for some reason, even though she was rotten to me, every time she goes through something bad, who is there for her? No one else but me. But she makes it difficult, but just by being mean, but by being stubborn because her stubbornness is what makes things get bad. If she would just let me help her before things get so bad, things would be way easier for her and for me. I didn’t know she ran out of her meds because she tells me nothing. She waits till things get so bad and then I have to get into emergency mode. Now I have to make sure she always has her meds and who knows what other horrors are going to come up. Now I want to ask her when she wants to go to the foo tot, but I don’t want it to lead up to another fight. Especially now that she’s calm again.

The police came back here just before because they are supposed to do a follow up. They asked her if she wants a home care attendant and she refused, claiming she doesn’t need one.

I do need to have a conversation with her about going to the doctor to get bloodwork. This could lead to another bad argument. Yet if I don’t, she will never get herself to the doctor. NEVER, and therefore endangering herself. Damned if I do, damned if I don’t. I really don’t need the cops here again because she feels I’m trying to control her.

I really don’t have anyone to help me. I talk to my sister and she avoids getting involved as much as she can. No family near by either.