My mother is a spiteful woman

[Edward]

You are extremely judgmental and have a lot of nerve making assumptions about me.

No Sister, I wasn't being judgmental. I was going to show you some scriptures which relate to the situation, since we're all Christians here, right?

Is is bad judgment to wonder if you love her at all after you've stated that you wish she would hurry up and die? That suggests that you don't love her. But I didn't want to be judgmental so I didn't make that assumption but rather asked you instead.

At this point, I could assume that you're only here seeking validation for yourself and sympathy as a victim and not really advice or guidance...but I wont, because I'm not here to get on your nerves. But the way you lashed out at me so fast, it sure seems like you have a bit of bitterness or hatred in your heart and redirected it towards me when you didn't hear what you wanted to hear. This is not a good thing for Christians who should be walking in love towards all and forgiving others, blessing enemies, and honoring their Father & Mother that your days be long upon the earth.

So I apologize if I hurt your feelings, but I think that you should re-examine your motives for being here.

 

[Edward]

You are extremely judgmental and have a lot of nerve making assumptions about me.

The direction that I was headed with it is,
Ephesians 6:12
12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.../

It's not really her fault. So it's ok to forgive her. If all sin and demonic oppression were taken off the earth...I bet she would be pouring out love to you. My dad used to yell at me too and sound hostile even up to around I was pushing 50. But I realized that he was simply doing the best he knew how with what he had. And it frustrated him to see that I had not grown up into exactly what he has envisioned. And that's why he barked at me.

We're Christian, right? We're trying at least. I fail. Everyone fails. How do you want me to be, Lord?

Ephesians

5 Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children;

2 And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.../

Well, Christ died for us while we were yet sinners. Sister, you are lucky that you still have your mom. Mine passed when I was 23. I'm not being judgmental. I'm just saying, understand. Love her for the time she has left. So she's set in her ways. Be bigger than that! You shouldn't fight her.

I know, yes it's irritating. It's grating on your nerves. It cuts deep. But she's your mom and you know you love her, lol. Well love is patient, love is kind, love is longsuffering.

And I kid you not, Sister. When we carry around bitterness or unforgiveness in our heart it always inhibits our spiritual growth. Jesus didn't tell us to forgive others as some kind of hard weirdo command. He told us that for our own good. It is more healthy for us to release bitterness and to forgive, both physically and spiritually.

 

[Michellay]

Perhaps if you mention about a carer and say it is going to happen whether you like it or not, it might work again ????

When it comes to anything that will, “turn into an old person” she will refuse and throw a huge tantrum. She still drive and knows her way around which is actually a scary thing because I’ve been in the car with her and her reaction time is very slow. She almost accidentally hit an elderly woman in the crosswalk and I freaked out. I said to her, “do you realize what just almost happened?” He response was “yeah yeah yeah I know. Ok enough already.” I’m always praying that she doesn’t endanger herself and others as well.

I don’t want to take her freedom away because having that freedom makes you feel like a whole person, but she needs to give up just a little bit in the areas where she needs assistance because she’s slowly killing herself and me in the process.

Yes that is a strenuous job. I have a very strong feeling you will be a great success.

You are an inspiration you have a great faith. Satan is not pleased but we know he can't win. Tell him to buzz off

Thank you very much. There is a lot of mental work involved as well between keeping track of scheduling and payments, designing different plans for different types of people and keeping track of their progress. Everyone responds differently and some need more coaching during a session than others.

I need to realize that this is God’s battle and that He’s using me and that He as already won against Satan.

 

[Michellay]

The direction that I was headed with it is,
Ephesians 6:12
12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.../

It's not really her fault. So it's ok to forgive her. If all sin and demonic oppression were taken off the earth...I bet she would be pouring out love to you. My dad used to yell at me too and sound hostile even up to around I was pushing 50. But I realized that he was simply doing the best he knew how with what he had. And it frustrated him to see that I had not grown up into exactly what he has envisioned. And that's why he barked at me.

We're Christian, right? We're trying at least. I fail. Everyone fails. How do you want me to be, Lord?

Ephesians

5 Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children;

2 And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.../

Well, Christ died for us while we were yet sinners. Sister, you are lucky that you still have your mom. Mine passed when I was 23. I'm not being judgmental. I'm just saying, understand. Love her for the time she has left. So she's set in her ways. Be bigger than that! You shouldn't fight her.

I know, yes it's irritating. It's grating on your nerves. It cuts deep. But she's your mom and you know you love her, lol. Well love is patient, love is kind, love is longsuffering.

And I kid you not, Sister. When we carry around bitterness or unforgiveness in our heart it always inhibits our spiritual growth. Jesus didn't tell us to forgive others as some kind of hard weirdo command. He told us that for our own good. It is more healthy for us to release bitterness and to forgive, both physically and spiritually.

All I’m looking for is validation?
So what?
Why should I be looking for anything else?
Seems when someone is looking for validation that’s when certain people enjoy giving criticism.
You say that I’m the one that’s angry and bitter as if everything happening to me is my own fault. I’m sick and tired of people coming along and telling me to look at myself rather than people seeing what is actually happening to me.
Go ahead. Blame me for having fibromyalgia chronic fatigue adhd ptsd. Go ahead and say that it’s all my fault that my mother is the way she is.
95% of the population would have probably suicided by now if they had to go through what I have gone through, and specificity my mother would have never been able to handle my life challenges. Yet, you assumed that she had a harder life than me.
Yes you meant to be critical because that is the only reason that type of spirit wants to make such assumptions.
If I didn’t have chronic fatigue I’d be so super successful that people would zip their lips when it comes to criticisms about me.
You say that Jesus tells us to forgive yet you disobey His command with your responses that give no validation whatsoever. How is that obeying God? You want to judge me, yet as you’re judging me you’re placing that judgment back on yourself.

Your responses are too proud. I don’t think you should be giving advice to people that are going through tough times until you take your pride out of the equation.

 

[Michellay]

The direction that I was headed with it is,
Ephesians 6:12
12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.../

It's not really her fault. So it's ok to forgive her. If all sin and demonic oppression were taken off the earth...I bet she would be pouring out love to you. My dad used to yell at me too and sound hostile even up to around I was pushing 50. But I realized that he was simply doing the best he knew how with what he had. And it frustrated him to see that I had not grown up into exactly what he has envisioned. And that's why he barked at me.

We're Christian, right? We're trying at least. I fail. Everyone fails. How do you want me to be, Lord?

Ephesians

5 Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children;

2 And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.../

Well, Christ died for us while we were yet sinners. Sister, you are lucky that you still have your mom. Mine passed when I was 23. I'm not being judgmental. I'm just saying, understand. Love her for the time she has left. So she's set in her ways. Be bigger than that! You shouldn't fight her.

I know, yes it's irritating. It's grating on your nerves. It cuts deep. But she's your mom and you know you love her, lol. Well love is patient, love is kind, love is longsuffering.

And I kid you not, Sister. When we carry around bitterness or unforgiveness in our heart it always inhibits our spiritual growth. Jesus didn't tell us to forgive others as some kind of hard weirdo command. He told us that for our own good. It is more healthy for us to release bitterness and to forgive, both physically and spiritually.

You are making a lot of assumptions here. Saying that I’m lucky that I have have my mother is extremely insensitive. Just because someone gives birth doesn’t make them a “mother.”

 

[Seasoned by Grace]

She was a hard worker at one point, but now she has turned into a lazy and sloppy person. She let herself go and gained about 70 pounds. She makes it difficult for me to clean the house because she makes such a big mess. My grandma kept her house clean until her last days even though she developed Alzheimer’s.

To be honest, my mother was extremely stingy with kindness. If have received way more kindness from others.

My father was not good to my mother. He wasn’t loyal.

I’ve forgiven her before, but she keeps rehashing old things. Calls me the W word, S word like she always did, instead of having a discussion. My feelings never mattered and they still don’t. So, forgiveness is extremely challenging here when the same behaviors are repeated, and those were just a few among the many.

Michelina
I'm a "Bit" older than you but had a mother who was difficult all my life from birth.
She didn't love either of us kids, and let it be known, but I still loved her and did my best to take care of her until she passed - One of my best days unfortunately

I understand how hard it must be and praise you for being there for her selflessly.

Having friends and talking to them can help a lot if their willing to listen.
I had friends who would listen and let me "VENT", and boy did that help.

Keep coming here and talking about it, even if some here may not agree with you, it's not their life, and they don't have to live it. Your the one who needs positive support as you have to deal with this.

God bless you my sister in Christ. Sometimes life is a trial.
My name is OLIGOS