So What's Your Take On This?

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HeIsRisen2018 said:
I was just wondering something. If a man or a woman is dating somebody or engaged, is it or should it be alright to hug another person of the opposite sex and or kiss them on the cheek?
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Oh yea. Back to topic.

The only female who hugs me apart from my mother is a young woman who just turned 20. The first time I met her I sat down next to her and said hello and she said nothing and got up and walked away and wouldn't talk to me. She was probably terrified of me . Lol. I said to myself she will love me one day (friendly).

Now she runs and jumps on me and throws her arms around me and cannot stop hugging me when she sees me because now she knows me. Probably because over time she realised im not a sick perverted old man who wanted to hook up like every young guy she meets does, including all the old men who try get a bit and ask for her number. I was just being friendly.

I don't look at her sexually or as more than a friend or would ever try anything on her even she is amazingly stunning and every guy seems to want her. She just needs to stop flirting so much with guys as she is young and overwhelmed. She
is half my age, young enough to be my daughter, and very immature so there is obviously no connection. I take her fishing. We are going this weekend as she wants me to take her. She is like a sister to me. A sister I never had that is annoying but i care for.


It is comforting that someone, a beautiful young woman is not afraid of me. I need a hug sometimes. I'm a lonely dude so a hug can mean so much to someone like me. A 38yo single depressed dude.

On a side not it's not the same person I was talking about earlier in this thread.
 
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kiwidan said:
Oh yea. Back to topic.

The only female who hugs me apart from my mother is a young woman who just turned 20. The first time I met her I sat down next to her and said hello and she said nothing and got up and walked away and wouldn't talk to me. She was probably terrified of me . Lol. I said to myself she will love me one day (friendly).

Now she runs and jumps on me and throws her arms around me and cannot stop hugging me when she sees me because now she knows me. Probably because over time she realised im not a sick perverted old man who wanted to hook up like every young guy she meets does, including all the old men who try get a bit and ask for her number. I was just being friendly.

I don't look at her sexually or as more than a friend or would ever try anything on her even she is amazingly stunning and every guy seems to want her. She just needs to stop flirting so much with guys as she is young and overwhelmed. She
is half my age, young enough to be my daughter, and very immature so there is obviously no connection. I take her fishing. We are going this weekend as she wants me to take her. She is like a sister to me. A sister I never had that is annoying but i care for.


It is comforting that someone, a beautiful young woman is not afraid of me. I need a hug sometimes. I'm a lonely dude so a hug can mean so much to someone like me. A 38yo single depressed dude.

On a side not it's not the same person I was talking about earlier in this thread.
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Floyd, a man who passed away was known to greet at the door of his church with hugs.
 
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jasonc said:
Floyd, a man who passed away was known to greet at the door of his church with hugs.
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Aww,.. R.I.P Floyd,.. I'm sure that your kindness and dedication to showing the love of Christ has been rewarded. :halo
 
I'm not running anymore. I seen my friend I have known her for 25 years and yesterday for the first time I got to spend time with just her and her amazing daughter, the family I have always wanted. They are my family. For the first time in 20 years I have felt complete peace and comfort being with them. She knows we need each other.

Everytime I have seen her in the past she has always been with some dude and she knows im protective yet i always gone back to her. She has a boyfriend now she thinks is the one for her but he lives in another town and she knows when he turns up im not going to be comfortable and feel like I have lost my family, but I'm not leaving this time. Usually we lose contact for a while. But not anymore.

After staying with her and her daughter last night there is no way I can leave them. They are too special to me.

I said to her "you know we are going to grow old together" and she looked at me and said "I know that". She loves me I know it.
 
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kiwidan said:
I'm not running anymore. I seen my friend I have known her for 25 years and yesterday for the first time I got to spend time with just her and her amazing daughter, the family I have always wanted. They are my family. For the first time in 20 years I have felt complete peace and comfort being with them. She knows we need each other.

Everytime I have seen her in the past she has always been with some dude and she knows im protective yet i always gone back to her. She has a boyfriend now she thinks is the one for her but he lives in another town and she knows when he turns up im not going to be comfortable and feel like I have lost my family, but I'm not leaving this time.

After staying with her and her daughter last night there is no way I can leave them. They are too special to me.

I said to her "you know we are going to grow old together" and she looked at me and said "I know that". She loves me I know it.
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Aww,.. that's SO sweet and it's sticking a bit more to the topic as well. Thank you for sharing that. :)
 
HeIsRisen2018 said:
Aww,.. that's SO sweet and it's sticking a bit more to the topic as well. Thank you for sharing that. :)
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She knows because I love her im super protective. She wants me to meet her boyfriend when he comes up in a couple weeks and I have to give him a chance, but im not this time, I only want to spend time with her and her daughter as they are all I care about and are important to me, I don't care about some dude she's in a relationship with.

It's the same story everytime I see her, run, and come back. It's not happening anymore.
 
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This woman on a dating site first question asked me what I do, so I said im a pilot, she replied well done, so I sent her a photo of me throwing a paper plane. Lol.
 
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HeIsRisen2018 said:
I was just wondering something. If a man or a woman is dating somebody or engaged, is it or should it be alright to hug another person of the opposite sex and or kiss them on the cheek?
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I used to do this often. I dont think it is a sin, there will be physicality it all circumstances and situations surrounding loved ones.
 
kiwidan said:
Sounds like you were living in Saudi and forgot to wear your burka.
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Indeed. It certainly sounds like Islamic legalism instead of Christian liberty.

I have an idea of what should happen to guys who do that to their wives or children, and it ain't pretty ....
 
HeIsRisen2018 said:
I was just wondering something. If a man or a woman is dating somebody or engaged, is it or should it be alright to hug another person of the opposite sex and or kiss them on the cheek?
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Signs of affection need a context.
If I am not a huggy person and suddenly start showing physical affection to someone of the opposite sex, something is wrong.

If I tend to hug everyone I am close to, then of course there is nothing unusual.

Body language and flirting is a different thing though. Some people flirt as a way of affirmation. I worked with a girl like this, and it was literally what she did to show appreciation. For others it is a desperate way to get attention.

One problem I have is when you speak truth in Christ to someone who is lonely and in need, the emotional intimacy can often lead to inappropriate expressions, because the individual is not able to distinguish between the two.

If you are around insecure people, and any behaviour trigger is something that sets off jealousy or anger, keeping ones distance can be the best strategy. Among my kids generation, hugging is part of hello and goodbye. Interestingly they still have inappropriate closeness and flirting dislike, outside the bounds of brother/sister type relationships.

Another aspect of this subject is inappropriate possessiveness, where trust gives way to jealousy and anger, which is not acceptable. A kind of abuse, is closing people down, rather than talking through feelings and others behaviour, and ways of keeping everyone happy. I prefer talking things through, so its obvious where things are going and why.

God bless you
 
I believe it is okay, intimately is great i am sure that Jesus kissed and hugged people. Judas called Jesus friend and kissed Him, this implies to me that Jesus and His disciples greeted each other by kissing on the cheek. I do not believe Judas just kissed Jesus on the cheek once which was before betraying Him. Who doesnt hug, we hug our parents, and even grandparents. I do not see sin in mild intimacy.
 
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I always hug and kiss my grandma. At church women older than me will hug and air kiss the side of my face. It is sweet. It is in church. To many perverts in the world to understand. I would never kiss a man on the cheek unless it was my dad or grandad. That to me is different. I kissed a girl on her forehead during prayer, but it wasn't awkward or sexual and it was only on her head. She was heavy burdened like a sister and thought nothing of it. It depends on the time place and hiw it is fone.
 
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Nothing wrong with hug or handshake. Its written in gospel of Matthew to honor your father and mother. When I was child, I kissed my dad on the cheek. As a adult, its handshake.
 
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