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  1. Matthew77ask

    My husband ignores his role as the head of the house and I fee lost...

    as long as each partner knows the role they play- sometimes follower, sometimes leading, than it is ok..
  2. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    thanks pjt.... it is a pattern that was established - and i am to be blamed for it - when I told myslef that I wanted to take care of her - i tot that service is the love language that i am good at - ie doing ALL the household chores (ironing, laundry, mopping floor, marketing, etc) - these...
  3. Matthew77ask

    My husband ignores his role as the head of the house and I fee lost...

    I think I am feeling what your husband feel. I think my wife is feeling like you... that I do not take the lead... why ? because she always want to take the lead - and make all those decisions and says that I am no use, and she is shameful of me in front of her friends and hence will not bring...
  4. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    How to get the good times to last? Why is it that when my wife and I are having some good days - it only last a few days? We were ok on tuesday until saturday. On Saturday: i was ironing the family cloths until late at nite - I was watching movie on computer as well while ironing... at about...
  5. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    Again, what more can I say to you folks besides thank you - if I can - I would like to buy you all a nice dinner... I come here to seek help and advice on how to deal with the problems. The issue that I want to deal with is how I can cope with all these happenings, especially WHEN it happens...
  6. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    Many thanks for everyone who spend time and effort to chip in and give me support. Really appreciate your help. As these problems are very close - it is difficult to talk to people in church and close friends- and even Pastors. However, I also want to say that what keeps me going is how one of...
  7. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    I think I really need to learn quickly is ... HOW to management and CONTROL my emotions and hence anger when she flares up.... If I can do this.... and able to shut up all the words that she said... then the house can have peace .. and my kids will henceforth not suffer... [cos she likes to...
  8. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    Thanks.... OK - can you adv - like the physically - how to shut off the noise - at those moments.... what should I think of for example - or say (to myself). I figured that I could not change her and I have no control over her - however, I can control myself - so if I can do that - maybe we...
  9. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    Thank you for your time to answer.. No, we do not pray together - we had - once or twice - but she always say "you pray" then when I did - she goes off - instead of praying. Now we cannot talk also. Just last sunday we have a fight - real fight. On Sat I went out to buy dinner, we have a nice...
  10. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    Yes, both of us are Christians. I was not when we were married - and that became another point for her to quarrel about .. I was not because - at that time - looking at her behavior - why a Christian can be like that. As usual - there are events that God has created that tells me that GOD rules...
  11. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    I am not sure that I can just walk out.. I am chinese in the asian culture... walking out of marriage is not one of the common options. I also felt obligated to my kids and family as well.... of course if this is a job - I would have resigned long a go... I need strength to carry on....
  12. Matthew77ask

    I am so tired and frustrated - Help needed

    I am now 48.. married for about 19 years and have 2 daughters 18 and 16. My wife is not working but staying at home to do her internet trading. I wake up every morning at 550am to prepare breakfast for my kids. Then at 620am, I drove them to their schools - total journey time about 1 hour. I...
  13. Matthew77ask

    Am I overdoing the whole "submission" thing?

    Why is there need to do "submission" in marriage ? The end goal is to have a happy marriage where the house is peaceful, the family is happy and look towards GOD. If the bible call for the wife to "submit" - and if that will result in a happy family, what seems to be the problem of not doing...
  14. Matthew77ask

    Wifely submission from the husband's POV....

    For a long time she "suffers" because I could not provide "enough" big house, cars, maids etc. Then through some friends we did went to some couselling. she told the cousellor that she wanted "someone with authority to change me". It was a war in the couselling room... I could bring out specific...
  15. Matthew77ask

    Wifely submission from the husband's POV....

    I think a lot of women out there would disagree with this! However, the spirit is that if my wife were to take the cue, and do some of these, as a man - I can say, my heart will melt and she will gets anything her heart desires.... Let me give you a concrete examples... those mistresses, those...
  16. Matthew77ask

    Wifely submission from the husband's POV....

    It is strange - but true - in many cultures - wife "submission" is the key to long lasting marriage. The role of wife in the house is important. My malay muslim friend has a wife that heads the accounting department in Bank of America in Singapore. She does not argue with my friend and listen...
  17. Matthew77ask

    Wifely submission from the husband's POV....

    Reading through the threads I wished my wife would come to some senses too. There is a constant hate feeling in her that she will NOT want to submit. Actually, I do not need her to submit -as in bow down, but just go along the flow instead on insisting that ALL things MUST be done HER way...
  18. Matthew77ask

    Hello - from Singapore

    Hi there.... :) Greetings from Singapore. I have been looking for a forum where people can help me with my problems and adv me thru the words of GOD. I trust that this is the place... Many thanks.... Cheers!
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