Before I begin this post, let me first say that this is my first post, and possibly my last. I have not registered simply to "flame" Christianity, but rather because this specific post asked a question that I felt comfortable answering thoroughly regarding my own religious experience. I also want to say that this post is not meant to hurt anybody, so i apologize for any negative emotions evoked.
In a nation that prides itself on logistics, the scientific method, and empirical evidence, my heart weighs heavily in being surrounded by those who look past these important facts and reason only to hold on to a belief in one’s specific religion or God. The road to atheism was one that was filled with hardships (as often is the road to Christianity, or other belief systems, is), research, logical deduction, and education.
Let me start by saying that I used to be a very dedicated Christian. I read the Bible (almost cover to cover, but didn’t quite make it through), went to church 3-4 times a week, and thoroughly read publications regarding the Bible and scriptures (all of which referenced the scriptures several times for support). There were many seemingly unmistakable times when the “holy spirit†flowed through me, where I felt as if God was right by my side, and I felt unstoppable, comforted, and loved. One could argue that I’ve never truly been close to Christ or that I wasn’t truly feeling the holy spirit, but such an argument has no basis, as the feeling was as real to me as anybody else who claims such experiences.
At age fifteen, I left Christianity, but still had a belief in God. The reasons I left Christianity were fairly simple: it just wasn’t logical. That’s where “faith†comes in. Faith doesn’t require logic or reason, it just requires imagination and suspended disbelief. It’s the leap you take when there’s no logical reason or foundation for a theory, thought process, or belief. It is a leap that makes one instantly unreasonable: after all, you can’t reason with faith. Especially a faith that teaches that any teaching against the faith must be ignored: only the initial leap is required to be permanently beyond the devices of reason and logic. So at age fifteen, I left Christianity, for some reasons that to me were blatantly obvious. I am a very compassionate and kind person by nature, and I couldn’t find any excuse that the God I worshipped, who was infinitely compassionate, kind, and loving, would kill infants, whether those infants were birthed by sinners or not. I couldn’t find it compassionate that there would be a final war of Armageddon, in which God’s own creation would run around horrified as their fleshy bodies were obliterated by fire and brimstone. I couldn’t find it logical that I would be given the greatest gift in the world, the freedom of choice, and yet be punished for choosing the “wrong†thing to do. I didn’t see the reason behind the various contradictions in the Bible. I didn’t understand how so many who claim to be devoutly religious and devoted to God can without hesitation judge others for any reason, when the Bible, the book the entire religion is based on, clearly states to judge not others, for that is how you yourself will be judged. That’s right, that means if you judge homosexuals for their lifestyle and choices, you will be judged as a homosexual. To see so many “Christians†take mattters into their own hands to judge others boggles my mind. I also couldn’t understand the incongruence between the God of the old testament, and that of the new. One is a wrathful warrior, the other a kind, loving, compassionate being.
Things have definitely changed since I was fifteen. For six years, I continued to believe that there was a higher power that I didn’t understand, although it was quite evident that this higher power wasn’t a Christian. It was just too ironic that the majority of the characteristics of God reflected the simple thoughts and emotions of mankind two thousand years ago. The notion that man had in fact created God, contrary to popular inverse, became more and more likely. Biblical inconsistencies nagged my thoughts. Then a friend of mine, an aspiring philosopher and a woman more intelligent than most anybody I’ve ever met, was kind enough to bring to my attention the blatant sexism that permeates all of Christianity. It was Eve, not Adam, who disobeyed God in a moment of weakness and convinced Adam to eat the forbidden fruit. It was Eve who was cursed, along with all of womankind, with birth pain. It is woman who answers to man, and man who answers to Christ. It is woman who is the weaker vessel. Christ was too “pure†to experience the romance of a woman (which some would argue on the basis of Mary Magdeline). There are many scriptures to support God’s views regarding women having less responsibilities and abilities. And man was created in the image of God: God must also be a man. When do women catch a break?
Then there is science, the biggest thorn in the side of religion. For millennia, mankind was thought to be “created†by a higher power. Of course, now there is an overabundance of evidence that man wasn’t created, but rather evolved from lesser creatures over the course of millions of years. Granted, evolution is a theory, but only in that it is not testable, and understandably so, as it is not a fast process (unless you consider viruses and bacteria, which mutate and evolve as they please on a much shorter timeline). If one’s beliefs are to be based on probability, then it can safely be said it is much more likely that we evolved, unless God personally planted unlimited amounts of evidence of evolution to somehow throw everybody off course. Well, God could have simply created everything necessary for evolution to occur, but if that were the case, then God could be nothing more than a spark that started the entire process, which certainly doesn’t qualify for worship. Science has also made it clear that a man cannot lose his strength by having his hair cut, there is no evidence that Moses ever existed, that Jews were enslaved by Egypt, and the creation of Adam and Eve aren’t even close to fitting into the scientific timeline presented for the history of our planet.
Another great influence on my recent move from agnostic to atheism was the realization that all reality is perception. Ah, reality, what a strange mystery. Albert Einstein came up with a theory: the theory of relativity. This theory proves that a man on a spacecraft going the speed of light would age only a tiny fraction as much as everybody else on earth. Simply by moving faster, time would slow down, but to the man on the spacecraft, it wouldn't seem as if anything had changed or was different. Although both men were sharing the same experience of time, they were both drastically different. The same applies to the world around us. My mom once told me a story about how she used to walk my dog in the park during the summer, and she used to get angry because of the trash and graffiti in the park. But one day, instead she focused on the beautiful nature and smells around her, and her the walks she took with my dog changed to an experience that brought joy. Same experience, different perception, and her reality of the situation changed. This applies to religious beliefs as well: it's the only explanation for one person being SO certain that females cannot be priests, and another being absolutely certain of the contrary. Who's right? Well, the answer is neither: each person just chose a different belief, and it then became their reality. (For more on this, I strongly recommend the movie (What the Bleep Do We Know?")
Well, maybe the Bible is a book of parables and morals that we can live our lives by. Not everything in the Bible should be taken literally, one could argue. What, then, is to be taken literally, and what is to be taken figuratively? This is a matter of debate by millions, and is accountable for validating racism, sexism, war, discrimination, and murder by the various sects of Christianity. The main problem is simply that the Bible can be interpreted in so many ways. One would think that if only one manual was provided for all of mankind to live their life by, it wouldn’t be open to interpretation. Logically, one could also conclude that God cannot be omniscient, for if he knew the future, then free will would not exist, as the future would already be pre-destined. You might say that such things are beyond the realm of human understanding, which is why they can be true. Well, if that’s the case, let me state that unicorns exist, 1+1 = 3, and black and white are the same exact color, but these facts are outside of the realm of human understanding. Or perhaps, if you believe that God is omnipotent, then a good question would be can God make a rock so big that he can’t pick it up? This is a very simple example that shows the obvious flaws in the belief that God is all knowing, all powerful, etc., flaws that have been uncovered for centuries by philosophers such as Epicurus.
If you are religious, and you’ve read this far, then I thank you for your open-mindedness. Most should also notice, while reading this, that the human mind is very susceptible to bias. Whether this explanation of my atheistic views seems feasible or even probable or not, I safely assume that as even this document was read, your mind asserted its bias to make this probability less realistic simply because it doesn’t fit with what you already believe. The bias exists within all of us: it is human nature. But it often can make it more difficult to see another viewpoint or belief system, even if it is true, or at least much, much more accurate.
Honestly, I write this paper out of frustration. It’s troublesome to grow out of childhood only to be snapped to the realization that the majority of the earth’s population is still grasping wildly for beliefs that have no scientific backing, no logical backing, and that have throughout history proven only to destroy our race. More people have died fighting in the name of a lord or God than of any other cause, and whether it be your God(s) they died for or not, and whether you condone their actions or not, the fact remains billions have lost their lives for it. It saddens me to watch people judge one another in our nation, to see societies judge one another, to see countries judge one another, and to see religions pass judgment. All facets of religion have led to an overall enormously negative impact on our race. Inevitably, there will be a day when education, logic, and empirical evidence prevails, and religion will once and for all be denounced by mankind: it is as this time that enormous advances will be made in all areas of our experience on this planet.
I can proudly assure anybody reading this paper that becoming an atheist hasn’t affected my attitude on life, my compassion I feel for others, the love of friends and family, and the disgust I feel for the qualities possessed by those who murder, steal, lie, cheat, etc. Those indescribable feelings of joy, love, humility, and comfort that I used to experience when I was a Christian haven’t ceased, and I can guarantee that although belief in the lord is what provokes these emotions in many people, it is not the only outletfor experiencing them. And if you don’t take anything else from my story, please remember to always question. As Albert Einstein said, look at everything as if through “the eyes of a child,†always question what you are being taught, and thoroughly educate yourself with the opposing viewpoint, if for no other reason, to equip yourself with the logic to better defend your own beliefs.