CAN A MAN RAPE HIS WIFE?

[Rookie]

Can a man RAPE his wife?

Before you answer please watch this...

www.bit.ly/man_rape_wife

No, her denying him of her body and him getting aggressive may seem "rape-ish" but it's not that type of abuse. Her body is his and his body is hers. Although he has no right to beat his wife. If they follow the created order of Wife submitting and husband loving as Christ love the church, no marital issues would prevail

 

[Free]

A husband absolutely can rape his wife. It does happen and quite likely even among those who claim to be Christian.

1Co 13:4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
1Co 13:5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; (ESV)

 

[jaybo]

A husband absolutely can rape his wife. It does happen and quite likely even among those who claim to be Christian.

1Co 13:4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
1Co 13:5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; (ESV)

WHAT??? Rape is violent assault. There is no rationalization to justify that kind of behavior. Period.

The verses that you supply clearly indicate that the behavior of a rapist is not patient or kind and does not insist on its own way!

 

[Free]

WHAT??? Rape is violent assault. There is no rationalization to justify that kind of behavior. Period.

The verses that you supply clearly indicate that the behavior of a rapist is not patient or kind and does not insist on its own way!

That is exactly my point. A man may claim to love his wife but if he rapes her, he is insisting on his own way, and he is not being loving.

This counters the argument that a husband cannot rape his wife because her body belongs to him and his body to her.

 

[GodsGrace]

A husband absolutely can rape his wife. It does happen and quite likely even among those who claim to be Christian.

1Co 13:4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
1Co 13:5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; (ESV)

Free
I understand that men might think that rape is unwanted intimacy.....
Any intimate act violates a woman in some way.
But I think that a man that believes he could rspe his wife doesn't really understand what rape is and the physical, emotional and psychological damage it does.

 

[GodsGrace]

That is exactly my point. A man may claim to love his wife but if he rapes her, he is insisting on his own way, and he is not being loving.

This counters the argument that a husband cannot rape his wife because her body belongs to him and his body to her.

A man insisting on his own way may be misuse,,,,it may be unkind, but it's not rape.

 

[Free]

Free
I understand that men might think that rape is unwanted intimacy.....
Any intimate act violates a woman in some way.
But I think that a man that believes he could rspe his wife doesn't really understand what rape is and the physical, emotional and psychological damage it does.

I think it is the opposite--it is a man who believes he can't rape his wife doesn't really understand what rape is, nor the damage it does.

A man insisting on his own way may be misuse,,,,it may be unkind, but it's not rape.

My point was that rape is a man insisting on his own way, in a very strong sense.

 

[jaybo]

That is exactly my point. A man may claim to love his wife but if he rapes her, he is insisting on his own way, and he is not being loving.

This counters the argument that a husband cannot rape his wife because her body belongs to him and his body to her.

Okay, thanks for clarifying that. Clearly I misunderstood you post. I apologize for my reply.

 

[GodsGrace]

I think it is the opposite--it is a man who believes he can't rape his wife doesn't really understand what rape is, nor the damage it does.


My point was that rape is a man insisting on his own way, in a very strong sense.

I have to give your first paragraph some thought.
Those double negatives always make me pause!
Could you say it another way?

Because it comes out like this:
A MAN WHO BELIEVES HE CAN RAPE HIS WIFE
UNFERSTANDS WHAT RAPE IS.

NO REASON FOR CAPS...

 

[jasonc]

Strongly I suggest as the husband points a knife at his wife ,that you give me what I want .

Sorry my dark humor in that .

 

[Edward]

Free
I understand that men might think that rape is unwanted intimacy.....
Any intimate act violates a woman in some way.
But I think that a man that believes he could rspe his wife doesn't really understand what rape is and the physical, emotional and psychological damage it does.

That's an interesting point. So a husband can't rape his Wife. But she is his Wife so the preumption is that he loves her and would not hurt her. So his love for her would stand in the way of him taking her by force when she tried to turn him down. He doesn't have it in him to be rude to her. He Loves her! Nobody really posted the scripture just talked about it, here it is

1 Corinthians 7
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.../NLT

That has to be true because it is scripture. A man can not rape his wife who he loves. He may be feeling his oats and don't feel like her having a headache. So he pins her down and takes her. That's not rape, that's rude.

He didn't beat her, he took her, his Wife. If he beat her and took her then it may be called rape. But husbands who love their Wives do not beat them.

Story! About 400 years ago I had a steady gitlfriend and you know what young people like to do. One day she asked me to rape her. Now of course I knew that she didn't mean beat her and take it, she meant take me and ravish me. She had a por way of saying it. So she liked it rough. But she didn't fo home with a black eye or a arm in a sling, lol.

(Now the point of the story). If a man doesn't want to accept no as an answer from his Wife so he takes her anyway...he might be thinking that she may like it and be ravished herself? That she might desire in her heart to be taken by a real man and ravished thoroughly, but just be too humble of a girl to ever express those feelings to anyone even her husband!??

He would know the next morning if she appreciated it! He'll either get breakfast in bed or ignored. Not too complicated to figure out, lol.

 

[Edward]

Strongly I suggest as the husband points a knife at his wife ,that you give me what I want .

Sorry my dark humor in that .

A knife??!! Is he scared of her or something? I couldn't even imagine ever pulling a knife on my Wife. If a man has to pull a knife on his wife for sex, he married the wrong girl. Or is she really a girl?? Lol!

 

[jasonc]

A knife??!! Is he scared of her or something? I couldn't even imagine ever pulling a knife on my Wife. If a man has to pull a knife on his wife for sex, he married the wrong girl. Or is she really a girl?? Lol!

Well legally if I'm well trained in grappling and my wife knows I can kill her with a choke .and I politely suggest she just gave sex with me and she didn't want to but felt intimidated that is a crime .

It's the intent ,did the victim feel threatened ?

In armed robbery one can simply appear to have a weapon and it's considered as such or make a threat

 

[jasonc]

The rapists who raped my sister ,neither of them used any weapon .

They overpowered her .

 

[Edward]

1 Corinthians 7
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.../NLT

If a man has to rape his wife to get sex then something is wrong in the marriage. It's only 5 days a month you can't have her. That's not unreasonable.

But I have heard of a lot of sexless marriages. She hasn't been intimate with him in years. But she wont get divorced. She can't be surprised if he cheats in that situation, so she is wrong to do that to her husband and cut him off.

What if that guy didn't want to cheat, was a Brother in Christ and held out much faith that his marriage will be restored eventually, so he doesn't cheat. But he still tries with his wife...Every couple months, he goes in and takes her. He doesn't want to go outside the marriage, she is his by covenant...Did he do wrong to take her anyway?

I think in mans eyes, yes. In God's eyes, no.

 

[Edward]

Well legally if I'm well trained in grappling and my wife knows I can kill her with a choke .and I politely suggest she just gave sex with me and she didn't want to but felt intimidated that is a crime .

It's the intent ,did the victim feel threatened ?

In armed robbery one can simply appear to have a weapon and it's considered as such or make a threat

But being well trained in grappling and hand to hand means that one would not even need a knife, especially against his Wife.

The rapists who raped my sister ,neither of them used any weapon .

They overpowered her .

Now this is a situation of an entire different color. That was not her husband feeling neglected these were strangers and criminals who make the death warrant list!

 

[Free]

I have to give your first paragraph some thought.
Those double negatives always make me pause!
Could you say it another way?

Because it comes out like this:
A MAN WHO BELIEVES HE CAN RAPE HIS WIFE
UNFERSTANDS WHAT RAPE IS.

NO REASON FOR CAPS...

I might have actually misunderstood you, or you misunderstood me, or both, thanks to the ambiguity of English.

My initial statement was: "A husband absolutely can rape his wife. It does happen and quite likely even among those who claim to be Christian." By that I did not mean that a man is allowed to rape his wife, but rather that it is physically possible for a husband to rape his wife. I was arguing against the idea that marital rape is not possible because a wife's body belongs to her husband and his body to her, which some seemed to have argued.

You said: “But I think that a man that believes he could rape his wife doesn't really understand what rape is and the physical, emotional and psychological damage it does.”

Which I took to mean ... something different, I think.

My reply--"it is a man who believes he can't rape his wife that doesn't really understand what rape is, nor the damage it does"--is meaning that a man who thinks that there is no such thing as marital rape, that any and all sex with his wife, including forcing himself on her, is okay, doesn't understand what rape is.

I am much too tired to figure out our miscommunication, apart from the fact that I'm sure we are using different meanings of "could" and "can"--physically able vs. permitted.

 

[Free]

That has to be true because it is scripture. A man can not rape his wife who he loves. He may be feeling his oats and don't feel like her having a headache. So he pins her down and takes her. That's not rape, that's rude.

No, that's rape.

 

[Edward]

No, that's rape.

No. That's just a lack of consideration and rudeness. What you are missing in your estimation is Love. The girl is his Wife. If the man loves his Wife he will not hurt her. If he does not love her then why are they married?

A rapist beats the victim with no love. He traummatizes her. A man who takes his Wife that he loves wont traumitize her. That is the difference.

Besides, I've read some about this subkect before and it seems that statistics are showing that when a women is raped for real, the perpetrator is only inside of her body for less than 60 seconds. When a man takes his Wife, it lasts longer than 60 seconds!! I never heard of a 60 second husband! If he is out there, I'm sorry to hear that, Mamn.

What about the flip side of the coin. The woman wants attention, normal. You come in from work exhausted and want to go to sleep? You better not! If you don't tell your Wife you love her, someone else will.

Being too tired from work is not a good excuse. Working is a means to an end. You have to have money to provide for her (in todays world). But your goal was to have a wife and family, so the job was needed. Ok work is over for the day...so the day for the two married begins when you come home. Don't stand her up!

 

[stovebolts]

No. That's just a lack of consideration and rudeness. What you are missing in your estimation is Love. The girl is his Wife. If the man loves his Wife he will not hurt her. If he does not love her then why are they married?

A rapist beats the victim with no love. He traummatizes her. A man who takes his Wife that he loves wont traumitize her. That is the difference.

Besides, I've read some about this subkect before and it seems that statistics are showing that when a women is raped for real, the perpetrator is only inside of her body for less than 60 seconds. When a man takes his Wife, it lasts longer than 60 seconds!! I never heard of a 60 second husband! If he is out there, I'm sorry to hear that, Mamn.

What about the flip side of the coin. The woman wants attention, normal. You come in from work exhausted and want to go to sleep? You better not! If you don't tell your Wife you love her, someone else will.

Being too tired from work is not a good excuse. Working is a means to an end. You have to have money to provide for her (in todays world). But your goal was to have a wife and family, so the job was needed. Ok work is over for the day...so the day for the two married begins when you come home. Don't stand her up!

No man should force his wife into sex, let alone pin her down.
It is a mutual act where two become one. This is not only in the physical sense, but also emotional and spiritual.
When a man forces himself on a woman and she is in duress due to his act of violence, they are not one. And yes, forcing oneself on another is an act of violence.