Should An Adult Date A Minor?

[Norman]

I would...as long as she showered after work...oh, a mi-nor! That puts things in a totally different light.
With me, it was a maturity issue. When I was 14, I was a child. When I was 18, I was a man. When I was a teen, I never went out with anyone more than a year younger than me.
I'm single and in my 60s, I'd never consider seeing anyone younger than 50. But that's just me. I have a kid in his 40s. For me, as I get older, I find older women look better.
I don't know how many people are like that today.
The most astonishing thing in life for me today is that I'm in my 60s!
How did that happen? It's like I pulled a Rip Van Winkle...more like Rip Van Wrinkle!
My mid-life crisis didn't start until the day I turned 60. I feel younger than I've ever felt!
My daughter-in-law recently said to me, "If you dyed your hair, you'd look 60." Sigh!
I recently joined an online seniors group. I get along good with them as we relate well!
"What happened, man?"

 

[Edward]

I'd date a Miner. If she was at least 50, Lol.

You know what's better about older girls? Lots of things!

 

[evenifigoalone]

The thing is, they need to be at similar levels of maturity. I wouldn't approve of an 18 y/o with a 14 y/o
But a 19 y/o with a 17 y/o would be much closer in development. Anyone older than like 20 with a 17 y/o though is probably not a good idea.

 

[Norman]

That sounds reasonable. Back in the 70s, I met a 14 year old that was more mature than most 20 year olds, but that was an exception to the rule.
Her future husband and I became close friends and they had a little boy named Harley, who was the cutest little guy and when he talked, he sounded like Donald Duck.
Harley died of a drug overdose last year. Sometimes I don't like this life very much.
One day...nor more pain, or mourning, or pain, or death.

 

[Golgotha]

Mostly why I asked this is I've thought that some minors looked attractive before. (The lifeguards at our pool) I've commented on some YouTube videos that some celeb teens looked cute and I have said online that are some teens that I love as a younger brother or sister and sended them virtual hugs or kisses on the cheek.


Now obviously we aren't dating since I'm engaged and I'm not sexually attracted to any of them, but I was just afraid that somebody might get supicious anyways and my butt might be thrown in jail. Then again as usual I'm probably blowing it way out of proportion and worrying for nothing again. Just like I did when I commented on a minor's YouTube video when I thought that they were really pretty.

Probably should be asking Jesus to help you not to judge by outward appearances but the heart. I think Emerson said character was above intellect, but I also think character should be above beauty.

Scripture seem to teach women not to be concern about the outward appearance as the society we live in does hype them to do.

Proverbs 31:30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

1 Timothy 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.

1 Peter 3:Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

Then there is this; we may not be lusting but pride of life does seem to appeal to us than those who do not raise to the standard of public appeal.

1 John 2:15 Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. 17 And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

2 Timothy 2:22 Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

One can apply that to flee pride of life too.

Do we show Christ's love equally to the unattractive or the disfigured? Naturally, we would abstain for why we need His love to help us love others without partiality.

Do we need to discern ourselves for why we compliment others? Is it to encourage them or to flatter them in giving them a swell head? Should we not encourage others when they do something good or do we compliment them on their appearance and thus raise the level of expectations on themselves to maintain that appearance?

I knew a married man that defended himself for looking at a pretty woman by saying, "I'm not dead", but then I said to him in humor that he was gonna be, thus inferring his wife's displeasure if she had known.

That is the thing I have noticed about men looking at women and that is when the women do it, the men are offended.

So I believe we need the Lord's help to not look at people as society has trained us to do, even for ourselves to avoid the pride of life.

Psalm 36:10 O continue thy lovingkindness unto them that know thee; and thy righteousness to the upright in heart. 11 Let not the foot of pride come against me, and let not the hand of the wicked remove me.

Should an adult date a minor?

I think an adult should date a major, if you can pardon the pun. Living that reconciled relationship with God thru Jesus Christ Whom happens to be the Bridegroom should be foremost in our thoughts & hearts with His help so we can keep the foot of pride from ourselves as well as other people too.

 

[Prycejosh1987]

Of course not. There are mature ages, and younger people tend to be emotional and immature. Not wise to date someone that is a minor, not only just because its against the law.

 

[PrimFinallyFoundGod!]

Nope. Regardless of whos the male and whos the female. Its called grooming.

 

[evenifigoalone]

Where the grey area comes in is like, when you have someone who is 17 dating a 16 y/o, and then the 17 y/o turns 18. Should they no longer date until the 16 y/o turns 18?

 

[jasonc]

Where the grey area comes in is like, when you have someone who is 17 dating a 16 y/o, and then the 17 y/o turns 18. Should they no longer date until the 16 y/o turns 18?

Parents and in my county that can be a crime .
Florida law is 22 to 16 ,I'm talking about statuatory rape .counties such as mine made it 18.
The parents can quash that as well .

Look up dont hate free Kate .a case like this

 

[evenifigoalone]

Well I'm glad I had no interest in dating as a teen

 

[Riven]

Well I'm glad I had no interest in dating as a teen

Neither did I. But I was a fat kid. So it's not like they were knocking down my door.

 

[Highway54]

It's just a question that's been on my mind since I saw this Dr. Phil clip. Obviously he's talking about the alcohol being a problem, but if it doesn't include sexual contact I really don't think that it would be illegal. Definitely unwise because it could lead to something else, but I don't think it would wind you up behind bars for it. Also, I do think that there is a difference between a passionate kiss and a friendly kiss on the cheek. :yes

Depends on the circumstances, if one turns 18 prior to the other, should they stop their relationship because of worldly laws? No. Common sense should be applied, sometimes laws are not made by it.

 

[Zeth4500]

well, lets put a bit of science into this, ill also reference a quote un-christian guy named doug stanhope

so, first things first. when did god decide women to be ready for having children? basically as soon as they start having a period- "women", at this age, arguably girls. sure.
now, typically males, boys, start having reproductive urges about 1 year later than the girls do
ive personally known one girl that had hers at 8, and i myself was an avid sinner also at the age of 8. is this however the ideal age? i honestly dont think so. but we are capable of it at that age!

now, ive spent a bunch of time online talking to people, and naturally women would end up in our social circles, and you sure can get attached even through text on the internet, the fact that the guys would be mid to late 20s didnt seem to scare these women, or girls off. rather, they would invite their friends
some of them were so young they had to lie about their age to avoid us just cutting all contact with them. i have also in my town, in social circles seen women just around age of 17 spending time around guys of the same mid to late 20s and even slight bit above age of 30
not just online, but in real life, in person im seeing that women desire not men just 1 year older than themselves, but, a much higher difference in age, and this ontop of some writings coming from an internet forum explaining that "back in the day" it was quite normal for .. very young women to get married to guys maybe 10 years older than themselves - its a lot of text and i badly wanted to disagree with it but i honestly couldnt. frustratingly!
one of the arguments was that if a woman doesnt right away as she hits fertile age get with a guy and dedicate herself to this one man, she will end up becoming emotionally damaged as she will end up attaching to other men- emotionally, assuming she will remain virgin. but still having formed emotional attachments, and thus emotional issues. women are also getting brainwashed in the years where their fertility kicks in

ontop of that, science claims the peak of sexual marketplace value for women is age 22, where its 35 for men
i think- if both that male and female like each other and their intentions are pure, then i dont see why it would be wrong to start early. only issue is that having children too early could be bad as the parents arent developed properly, however eggs will also degrade and the offspring will be of worse quality for every year

im gonna have to say: yes, it shouldnt be an issue
based on my own experience, based on gods design of humans, based on other writings on this- yes we were designed to start earlier than 18. and especially with an age gap!

 

[D-D-W]

I never really understood though if an older man thinks a younger woman is attractive they don't call it anything but if it's an older woman they're called a cougar.

Actually they call him a pedophile.

 

[Corn Pop]

Kiedis is receiving criticism at the moment because he's dating a 19yo old and he's turning 62.

He's a celebrity and rich and famous with high status and he obviously takes advantage of grooming teenage girls.

Obviously the lefty liberals are saying well it's all good as long as they are happy trying to justify men over 60 having relations with teenage girls.

Kiedis acknowledged in his autobiography Scar Tissue that he had, and I will be politically correct here and just say "relations" with a 14yo girl when he was 23, before and after learning of her age, in the 1980s.

And now he's near 62 and still into having relations with teenage girls and hes with a 19yo, probably only because shes legal and he cannot go to prison for it, otherwise who knows how young he would go.

 

[Tenchi]

Should An Adult Date A Minor?​

No. It isn't merely age that distinguishes an adult from a minor. There are developmental differences, especially concerning the brain, that give power to the adult over the minor. The adult's greater emotional and intellectual development and resulting sophistication in these areas can be easily leveraged against the minor. Just consider the way in which adult grooming gangs manipulate teen-aged girls into sex work.

Typically, too, a minor is not fully independent, living in their parents' home and being cared for by them. This creates an additional imbalance relationally between an adult and a minor in a dating circumstance, making the minor further vulnerable to exploitation and manipulation by the adult. Think of the thirty-something man with a car, his own apartment or home, and a burgeoning career who takes up with a seventeen-year-old girl and is able to entice her into a relationship with himself with things no boy the girl's own age would ever be able to offer her: Expensive dates, and gifts, and trips, a ready-made private, comfortable location with no threat of parents suddenly appearing, etc.

Of course, when I'm thinking of an adult and a minor dating, I'm not thinking of a legal adult who is only, say, a year older than the minor he's dating but of a man, say, in his late twenties who is dating a fifteen year old. Such a relationship would be entirely wrong for the reasons above (and others, besides).