PrimFinallyFoundGod!
Member
- Mar 3, 2023
- 315
- 344
Hi guys. I've been wondering whether or not to post this for a few days. I'm just going to go for it!
I understand I'm risking hurtful comments and heated discussions. All I will ask is that everybody stays calm and respectful please. I'm going to share my experience and then relate it to my faith.
I'm a lesbian. I have found women attractive since as long as I can remember. When I was a very small child (probably about 5) I would feel confusion when women around me used to oggle and comment on "sexy" men on television. It felt confusing and even a bit gross. Women, however, took my breath away. Such beauty! I didn't know what lesbianism was though so I didn't think much about this.
I actually realized I was lesbian very late. I was 18. Through my teen years I just thought I was bisexual but "Picky" with males. I tried dating boys but I was awkward, grossed out and didn't want to do anything outside of normal friendship things. I just assumed it is because I was an "innocent" girl and also an abuse survivor.
I suppose I was thinking about the signs and it just clicked when I was 18. "Oh my goodness.. I'm gay!" I felt scared for some reason. I guess I was worried what my future would look like with this knowledge. I felt wrong for feeling scared but I couldn't help it. It is a potentially life changing realization.
Shortly after this I met a man. We were friends and he helped me navigate life being abused. For example he helped me get a job and would get me home safely. I won't get into that here as that is for a different time and I may of already said about it.
Fast forward to today. We live together "socially married" and are happier and closer than ever.
I did share my experience of this "lesbian dating a man" once on a different non religion related forum and was met with intense hostility. How can a woman be gay and with a man???
I met a girl on there who messaged me because secretly she was going through the same experience. She set up an experiment by creating a fake profile on this forum and made a fake thread "gay man dating a woman" and it was very similar to mine. She was met with positivity and love. So clearly it was a sexism issue rather than a sexuality issue that caused the hostility I received.
The hostility was so severe people tried to say I was being abusive to my partner JUST by being with him. Incredibly hurtful as I'm his carer and have saved his life multiple times already. He has a very serious disease called CESD (look it up it's on a rare disorders website if you wish).
Anyway. I'd like to state my opinion now on homosexuality and faith. This is merely my opinion so please bare this in mind. Yours may differ and that is absolutely fine.
There is no such thing as "former gay". To say this is actually sinful. Here's why I think this: My experience as a gay person clearly shows me it is a mental illness you are born with. We are all natural sinners because Adam and Eve used their free will to sin in the garden of Eden. It is important you repent, confess, acknowledge your sins. If you deny them you are not being honest with yourself, others or God.
Lets break this down. I believe the following:
Gay is a mental illness. Humans are a type of animal. Basic biology is that animals that reproduce sexually need to attract a mate. If gay is normal for a species then said species may die out due to them not reproducing. This totally dismantles the belief some gay people have that "everybody is gay. there is no such thing as straight". We believe other mental illness' are illness' for the same basic reason. They cause humans to behave in a way that challenges their health and state of being alive. Such as depression for example.
We know depression is an illness and self harm is sinful. That does not mean depressed people are condemned for hell, hated and shut out does it? Why treat gay people like that then? We ALL sin. It is God's job to judge not man. God gave man free will.
I do believe we can still classify it as a sexual orientation however. It is a sexual orientation. But it is an unnatural one clearly caused by a biological fault. Aka an illness.
There is a difference between a gay person and a PRACTICING gay person. You cannot be a former gay person. But you can be a NON PRACTICING gay person.
How are gay people saved then?
Well. As I keep stating we are ALL sinners. Every human being has an inclination to a specific deadly sin. In this example we are talking about Lust.
You may of heard of famous gay people who were "closet" but sleeping around with members of the same sex. If gay is to be considered a sexual orientation, then we cannot continue with the sympathy for these promiscuous gay people. It has nothing to do with them being gay in itself. If a gay person is in a straight relationship, they do not automatically start needing to have sex with many of the same sex. That is a lie.
Straight people are not automatically promiscuous because of their orientation. Some are but that is a CHOICE.
In other words. As a result of the sin of Lust (and adultery), some straight and some gay people choose to sleep around. They do not deserve sympathy and acceptance in doing this because it is not victimhood or being "trapped" in their relationships. It is a choice. The real victim is the partner who is being lied to and cheated on.
The people who believe in these lies are the same people who would respond with hostility to me, and as you can see from my previous example, they already did. I am a gay person but I'm not their image of gay. These people do not want you to know I exist.
Am I gay? Yes. Am I growing in faith? Yes. Am I attracted to my partner? Yes.
These people cannot grasp those concepts. But it is my truth. And further supports my belief that it is another mental illness. In spite of it, I am still able to connect with the opposite sex. I don't feel lust for them like I can for women. But as a loving person I am capable of falling for the personality of the opposite sex. I am also capable of finding my partner attractive because I am in love with him and recognise his good looks (sort of like you may recognise a celebrity of the same sex is good looking despite being straight). I am just in love with him too because of the selfless acts he committed out of being a good caring person for me.
As a result of Leviticus 18:22 (I hope I'm quoting the right one lol) I have made the decision to not practice my homosexuality. Not because I hate myself. I'm not "going without". I'm not "denying myself". I'm not a "victim". As I am in a happy loving relationship with my partner, I have no reason to have relations with anyone else man or woman. I'm very monogamous and have 0 desire to do this. So what difference does it make if I choose not to practice my lesbianism?? I am going to marry my partner legally and stay with him. I will be faithful and monogamous throughout. I will follow the biblical teachings of being a good wife. And again, I'm not a "victim". I am happy this way. It keeps everything holy, in balance, peaceful and good.
So in conclusion I am exposing the lies people are feeding you. You can be non practicing gay and perfectly happy and fulfilled. Being gay and having an uncontrollable urge to be promiscuous unless you are "accepted" is a lie. A gay person CAN be in love with the opposite sex. The cause of the initial attraction is just different that is all.
I understand it is a hard concept to wrap your head around. I struggle to explain it properly! But I'm trying my best. If you have questions please do ask me. I want to answer and help you guys understand because gay people like me do exist and awareness is a good thing as my existence proves that you can be gay and faithful. They really don't want you to know these things but awareness is important as it can show young people they are not automatically hated by God just because they fancy the same sex. This is one of the biggest reasons why young turn away from God. Society FALSELY teaches people that God is hateful, controlling and restrictive. It's all lies!
I will not be responding to blatant homophobia or hurtful responses. But I will respond to any questions. No genuine question will offend me at all. I'm mostly just hoping the friends I have made here won't hate me for this :D I promise the above is 100% my truth based on my experiences.
I understand I'm risking hurtful comments and heated discussions. All I will ask is that everybody stays calm and respectful please. I'm going to share my experience and then relate it to my faith.
I'm a lesbian. I have found women attractive since as long as I can remember. When I was a very small child (probably about 5) I would feel confusion when women around me used to oggle and comment on "sexy" men on television. It felt confusing and even a bit gross. Women, however, took my breath away. Such beauty! I didn't know what lesbianism was though so I didn't think much about this.
I actually realized I was lesbian very late. I was 18. Through my teen years I just thought I was bisexual but "Picky" with males. I tried dating boys but I was awkward, grossed out and didn't want to do anything outside of normal friendship things. I just assumed it is because I was an "innocent" girl and also an abuse survivor.
I suppose I was thinking about the signs and it just clicked when I was 18. "Oh my goodness.. I'm gay!" I felt scared for some reason. I guess I was worried what my future would look like with this knowledge. I felt wrong for feeling scared but I couldn't help it. It is a potentially life changing realization.
Shortly after this I met a man. We were friends and he helped me navigate life being abused. For example he helped me get a job and would get me home safely. I won't get into that here as that is for a different time and I may of already said about it.
Fast forward to today. We live together "socially married" and are happier and closer than ever.
I did share my experience of this "lesbian dating a man" once on a different non religion related forum and was met with intense hostility. How can a woman be gay and with a man???
I met a girl on there who messaged me because secretly she was going through the same experience. She set up an experiment by creating a fake profile on this forum and made a fake thread "gay man dating a woman" and it was very similar to mine. She was met with positivity and love. So clearly it was a sexism issue rather than a sexuality issue that caused the hostility I received.
The hostility was so severe people tried to say I was being abusive to my partner JUST by being with him. Incredibly hurtful as I'm his carer and have saved his life multiple times already. He has a very serious disease called CESD (look it up it's on a rare disorders website if you wish).
Anyway. I'd like to state my opinion now on homosexuality and faith. This is merely my opinion so please bare this in mind. Yours may differ and that is absolutely fine.
There is no such thing as "former gay". To say this is actually sinful. Here's why I think this: My experience as a gay person clearly shows me it is a mental illness you are born with. We are all natural sinners because Adam and Eve used their free will to sin in the garden of Eden. It is important you repent, confess, acknowledge your sins. If you deny them you are not being honest with yourself, others or God.
Lets break this down. I believe the following:
Gay is a mental illness. Humans are a type of animal. Basic biology is that animals that reproduce sexually need to attract a mate. If gay is normal for a species then said species may die out due to them not reproducing. This totally dismantles the belief some gay people have that "everybody is gay. there is no such thing as straight". We believe other mental illness' are illness' for the same basic reason. They cause humans to behave in a way that challenges their health and state of being alive. Such as depression for example.
We know depression is an illness and self harm is sinful. That does not mean depressed people are condemned for hell, hated and shut out does it? Why treat gay people like that then? We ALL sin. It is God's job to judge not man. God gave man free will.
I do believe we can still classify it as a sexual orientation however. It is a sexual orientation. But it is an unnatural one clearly caused by a biological fault. Aka an illness.
There is a difference between a gay person and a PRACTICING gay person. You cannot be a former gay person. But you can be a NON PRACTICING gay person.
How are gay people saved then?
Well. As I keep stating we are ALL sinners. Every human being has an inclination to a specific deadly sin. In this example we are talking about Lust.
You may of heard of famous gay people who were "closet" but sleeping around with members of the same sex. If gay is to be considered a sexual orientation, then we cannot continue with the sympathy for these promiscuous gay people. It has nothing to do with them being gay in itself. If a gay person is in a straight relationship, they do not automatically start needing to have sex with many of the same sex. That is a lie.
Straight people are not automatically promiscuous because of their orientation. Some are but that is a CHOICE.
In other words. As a result of the sin of Lust (and adultery), some straight and some gay people choose to sleep around. They do not deserve sympathy and acceptance in doing this because it is not victimhood or being "trapped" in their relationships. It is a choice. The real victim is the partner who is being lied to and cheated on.
The people who believe in these lies are the same people who would respond with hostility to me, and as you can see from my previous example, they already did. I am a gay person but I'm not their image of gay. These people do not want you to know I exist.
Am I gay? Yes. Am I growing in faith? Yes. Am I attracted to my partner? Yes.
These people cannot grasp those concepts. But it is my truth. And further supports my belief that it is another mental illness. In spite of it, I am still able to connect with the opposite sex. I don't feel lust for them like I can for women. But as a loving person I am capable of falling for the personality of the opposite sex. I am also capable of finding my partner attractive because I am in love with him and recognise his good looks (sort of like you may recognise a celebrity of the same sex is good looking despite being straight). I am just in love with him too because of the selfless acts he committed out of being a good caring person for me.
As a result of Leviticus 18:22 (I hope I'm quoting the right one lol) I have made the decision to not practice my homosexuality. Not because I hate myself. I'm not "going without". I'm not "denying myself". I'm not a "victim". As I am in a happy loving relationship with my partner, I have no reason to have relations with anyone else man or woman. I'm very monogamous and have 0 desire to do this. So what difference does it make if I choose not to practice my lesbianism?? I am going to marry my partner legally and stay with him. I will be faithful and monogamous throughout. I will follow the biblical teachings of being a good wife. And again, I'm not a "victim". I am happy this way. It keeps everything holy, in balance, peaceful and good.
So in conclusion I am exposing the lies people are feeding you. You can be non practicing gay and perfectly happy and fulfilled. Being gay and having an uncontrollable urge to be promiscuous unless you are "accepted" is a lie. A gay person CAN be in love with the opposite sex. The cause of the initial attraction is just different that is all.
I understand it is a hard concept to wrap your head around. I struggle to explain it properly! But I'm trying my best. If you have questions please do ask me. I want to answer and help you guys understand because gay people like me do exist and awareness is a good thing as my existence proves that you can be gay and faithful. They really don't want you to know these things but awareness is important as it can show young people they are not automatically hated by God just because they fancy the same sex. This is one of the biggest reasons why young turn away from God. Society FALSELY teaches people that God is hateful, controlling and restrictive. It's all lies!
I will not be responding to blatant homophobia or hurtful responses. But I will respond to any questions. No genuine question will offend me at all. I'm mostly just hoping the friends I have made here won't hate me for this :D I promise the above is 100% my truth based on my experiences.