Should the churches have some say in divorce

[Jethro Bodine]

...the church, as a whole, buries its head in the sand (just like individuals)...

That's what I'm seeing....a lot of butts when it comes to addressing divorce in the congregation. They seem extremely reluctant to call someone out for getting an unBiblical divorce. As if it's purely a personal matter.

 

[Jethro Bodine]

I dunno. When we covered suicide in one of my classes, long, long ago, the professor pointed out that Jewish communities also usually have lower divorce and suicide rates, even though divorce is available and suicide isn't particularly taboo. I think the way Catholics do things--you have to be a member of the community to work out your salvation, confession to a priest, being a part of the body--reduces isolation and helps build community.

Hmm...dunno. I guess I don't know because I can't relate. I haven't had a sense of community in the church since 1994.

 

[Jethro Bodine]

Grace before divorce ?

I've heard of grace before dinner.

Not really catching your drift.

 

[Christ_empowered]

Yeah, I can't relate, either. I grew up on the liberal end of PCUSA. I didn't experience community because of social class issues. My well-educated, but not particularly affluent, parents weren't "good enough" for a lot of the WASP people there, so I just kinda floated through. The Pentecostals are a bit better, but I still didn't feel community....

...the problem really is largely social. I mean, I'm not saying the church can't do something, I just don't know what we're supposed to do, you know. Society is fragmented and continuing to fragment, further. Maybe I'll just go Catholic, lol.

 

[Rollo Tamasi]

There's nothing like a Christ-centered marriage.
I

 

[Jethro Bodine]

The Talmud addresses this issue, and overall, agree a divorce is legitimate.

That's interesting.

Me personally? I gotta go with Jesus on this one. Drug/ alcohol abuse, physical/ emotional abuse....move out, but don't get a divorce. Don't get a divorce for any reason except adultery or abandonment.

 

[Jethro Bodine]

There's nothing like a Christ-centered marriage.
It lasts forever.

You mean forever, as in this lifetime, right?

 

[Willie T]

Willie T ↑
...the church, as a whole, buries its head in the sand (just like individuals)...

That's what I'm seeing....a lot of butts when it comes to addressing divorce in the congregation. They seem extremely reluctant to call someone out for getting an unBiblical divorce. As if it's purely a personal matter.

Actually the first sentence carried the REAL intent of my post.....

It starts with the necessity of familial involvement on a normal, regular basis with the church, LONG before problems reach the point of talking about divorce proceedings.

 

[Christ_empowered]

The church doesn't hold, nor does it exercise, the power it once had to regulate peoples' behavior.

 

[Rollo Tamasi]

That's interesting.

Me personally? I gotta go with Jesus on this one. Drug/ alcohol abuse, physical/ emotional abuse....move out. Don't get a divorce for any reason except adultery or abandonment.

Don't get me wrong.
From what I've read, not all rabbis that have written in the Talmud agree on this issue.

 

[Kathi]

I'm completely sympathetic to that kind of situation but the actual answer is to move out of the house and out of harms way, not get a divorce. Not an easy situation to be in and certainly deserves our heartfelt empathy and support no matter what the outcome.

I agree that the first steps should be to separate and go for counseling.If he or she wants to be the spouse that God wants them to be then a reconciliation is in order and that is wonderful.If not after quite some time of anticipating change then a divorce needs to be considered.

 

[Jethro Bodine]

Yeah, I can't relate, either. I grew up on the liberal end of PCUSA. I didn't experience community because of social class issues. My well-educated, but not particularly affluent, parents weren't "good enough" for a lot of the WASP people there, so I just kinda floated through. The Pentecostals are a bit better, but I still didn't feel community....

...the problem really is largely social. I mean, I'm not saying the church can't do something, I just don't know what we're supposed to do, you know. Society is fragmented and continuing to fragment, further. Maybe I'll just go Catholic, lol.

I know almost squat about the Catholics, but beyond the weird hierarchy of leadership, what I am gleaning is they may well be more in line with the truth than we've given them credit for.

 

[Kathi]

Grace before divorce ?
Luk 11:4 And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil.

Definitely but If you are being horribly abused then that Grace gets set aside for your safety.

 

[Rollo Tamasi]

You mean forever, as in this lifetime, right?

Yes
Yes, yes, yes
Yes!

 

[Kathi]

There's nothing like a Christ-centered marriage.
I

Is that you and the Mrs.Rollo?

 

[Willie T]

I dunno. When we covered suicide in one of my classes, long, long ago, the professor pointed out that Jewish communities also usually have lower divorce and suicide rates, even though divorce is available and suicide isn't particularly taboo. I think the way Catholics do things--you have to be a member of the community to work out your salvation, confession to a priest, being a part of the body--reduces isolation and helps build community.

Thus.......... The need for the church to actually be involved with ALL the families of the congregation,.... all the time.... BEFORE things get so bad that the only answer is mediating a divorce.

 

[Rollo Tamasi]

Is that you and the Mrs.Rollo?

Could be, could be...

 

[Willie T]

Man! Talk about shutting the barn door AFTER all the horses have run off.
What do we think Acts 2 was all about?

 

[Edward]

If the marriage is unto God and they were married in a church then it does stand to reason that church elders should be involved in the domestic dispute and giving guidance to the couple.

 

[Kathi]

If the marriage is unto God and they were married in a church then it does stand to reason that church elders should be involved in the domestic dispute and giving guidance to the couple.

If the couple approaches the elder.It should be taken to God first.